I'm really missing my dad this week. It is hard to put into words. His sense of humor, laughter, and wisdom. I miss watching him work. He made the most difficult tasks seem so easy. It seems that I have spent the last 5 years preparing for these feelings, but I don't guess you are every fully prepared to lose a parent. Although, I felt like we lost him 5 years ago.
It has been a long time, even prior to his death, since I have had a good conversation with him due to the dimentia. He had been battling dimentia for 5 years that we know of, and we have no idea how long the symptoms were occurring in his mind and body.
But we did not have to talk. As many know, Dad was a man of few words. Now he could talk with the best of them, but chose to err on the quiet side. But when he spoke, I listened. Honestly, I just enjoyed being with him, even if we never said a word.
I have found myself going by the cemetery at different times. Not just because his physical remains are resting there, but because of what God spoke there the day he was buried. It was as much a corporate word of encouragement as it was personal for me and the family. I believe it’s been a turning point in my life and ministry. I feel a deep sense of destiny and I am believing God for miracles...deep, deep longings of my heart.
So I don't go to the cemetery just to grieve, but it has become a memorial of what God did January 14, 2013. The Bible says that God's ways are higher than our ways and that He can use anything to accomplish his will and purpose. Yes, even the funeral of a faithful, simple carpenter.
In all these things, God is faithful! Hebrews 10:23 rings in my heart every day..."Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering, for He is faithful that promised."
I love you dad... you will always be my hero! Thank you for following Jesus and for leaving a legacy of faith in action.
Facing Forward,
Stan
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